I never work on more than one project at a time.
However.
First, I s-e-r-i-o-u-s-l-y have to get LMB finished. Enough is enough. Yet I'm also chomping on the bit to make a few changes to Rinn before sending her off. And now, God forbid, the (*gasp*) "S" word has hit me.
No, not synopsis, haha.
And nothing to do with bodily functions for once.
You ready?
It's not carved in stone, mind you. And considering I have a several hard drives cluttered with unfinished manuscripts, I can't even say if it's a realistic possibility.
But you know how that ~ONE~BRILLIANT~IDEA~ sticks with you and it's all you can think about day and night? Well, unless you're sleeping because then you'd be awake and thinking about it anyway and wondering why you can't stop thinking about it so you can get some sleep.
How you have no idea what someone just said to you and they get all miffed and attitudey, like, "Hello, did you hear a single word I just said?!?"
And the answer to them is NO because you're way too busy thinking about the "S" word:
Sequel.
There. I said it.
OMG. I said it!
Monday, September 21, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
MY DWINDLING TBR LIST
My summer TBR list is ALMOST down to zero. This amazing feat was accomplished only because I broke my own rule about not reading in the same genre while working on something of my own. Then again, I was "revising"--not actually "writing" (or so I like to tell myself).
Lee Bantle: DAVID INSIDE OUT A coming-of-age/coming-out story that resonated with me in more ways than one.
Carrie Jones (2) carriejones: GIRL HERO --a delightful and very touching MG story --a nd NEED which changed my mind about pixies (and werevolves! ahhh!) the way Maggie Stiefvater's LAMENT changed my mind about faeries. Carrie, honestly--those pointed teeth did me in.
Sarah Littlman ![[info]](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_s-6eQY7qx_Vsm5AU-8KN6C2M57iPIglxZwSXn8nEG6l5hy170QWe0bSRSo8iLGWxZjwsVhPIu2VpLobj1FBtD8QHyOLps-Hs1Sy2YN7wlwPQ=s0-d){kind=small}
Margaret McMullan: CASHAY An inner-city teen learns that her own life doesn't end with the shooting death of her beloved sister.
Carrie Ryan: THE FOREST OF HANDS AND TEETH When the Unconsecrated (zombies) surround and eventually consume her isolated village, Mary risks her life to discover what's on the other side of the dreaded Forest.
Elizabeth Scott (2) : PERFECT YOU Though she's convinced the guy's only out for a good time, Kate, saddled with a rapidly imploding family life, regularly makes out with him at the mall (where she's forced to work with her very embarrassing father) -- Initially I almost dismissed this one as typical teen chicklit (which I generally don't read) but it was SO much more; wait till you meet Kate's grandmother! -- and BLOOM, where perfect Lauren realizes she is NOT the girl for her perfect (and very religious) boyfriend, especially when her long-lost stepbrother rolls into town.
Susan Vaught : MY BIG FAT MANIFESTO Jamie's fat--FAT! Don't insult her by calling her "heavy" or "plus-sized"--and wants the world to know who she is. But how comfortable can she be with herself when the hunky and hefty guy she loves decides to have bariatric surgery?
Carol Lynch Williams: THE CHOSEN ONE A young girl trapped in a religious cult tries to figure out a way not to marry her elderly uncle.
Michelle Zink: PROPHECY OF THE SISTERS In this gothic thriller, twin girls--one the Guardian, one the Gate--are pitted against each other by demonic forces.
Only 2 left!:
Mary Pearson: THE ADORATION OF JENNA FOX
Jo Knowles: JUMPING OFF SWINGS
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
PATRICK SWAYZE
1952-2009 LINK
Though no one will ever forget that pottery scene with Demi Moore in Ghost--undoubtedly one of the most sensual love scenes to hit the screen since Burt Lancaster and Deborah Kerr rolled around in the sand in From Here to Eternity--I first fell in love with Patrick Swayze when he starred in the 1980 mini-series NORTH AND SOUTH:
LINK
This mini-series is right up there with Thorn Birds. So if you ever have a few hours and you want to lose yourself in a historical romance, check out the DVD--you will not be disappointed!
Miss you already, Patrick.
Monday, September 14, 2009
SERENA
If Serena Williams was my PATIENT she'd get a couple jabs in the hip and a time-out in locked seclusion.
Just to put things in perspective.
Just to put things in perspective.
RANDON MONDAY
1. Today is the day to sign up for JoNoWriMo: "It's a bit like NaNoWriMo, only you get an extra 1.5 months AND you don't have to write an entire novel. Basically, it's a time each year that a bunch of writers get together to support and encourage one another to meet a writing goal and/or finish a project." So get over there, dudes, and commit yourselves. Jo rocks. You'll love it!
2. It's official: I'll be signing books at the Buckeye Book Fair in Wooster, Ohio on November 7. Anyone in the area, stop in (if not, road trip!) It's an awesome book fair, so much fun. More on this later.
3. Thanks for all your support in regard to Saturday's Blogger-Reviewer Rant. Isn't there a website where you can post the worst-friggin-review you ever received? I think so. Anyone know where it is?
4. Beth and I visited Grandma and Miss R. yesterday. Party in the dining room, with a band that played polkas and Big Band music and the old standards you expect to hear in a nursing home. Grandma sang along, clapped her hand and wiggled her feet--and then got up and danced with her walker! I swear she hasn't danced in half a century (and this is the woman who could barely walk a year ago). Twice she paused in front of an elderly man, took his hands, and swung them in time to the music as if they were dancing in place. The old man beamed with pleasure, and all I could think was: so what alien from which planet kidnapped that infinitely crabby woman who drove me straight up a wall for years and years, and replaced her with Miss Congeniality, the queen of the ballroom?!?
5. Kanye West previously made an A-double-S out of himself by proudly displaying his lack of literary genius, among his numerous other antics that made the news. Now he's out-Kanyed himself with his horrendously disrespectful treatment of Taylor Swift at last night's MTV Music Awards.
Stun gun, anyone?
2. It's official: I'll be signing books at the Buckeye Book Fair in Wooster, Ohio on November 7. Anyone in the area, stop in (if not, road trip!) It's an awesome book fair, so much fun. More on this later.
3. Thanks for all your support in regard to Saturday's Blogger-Reviewer Rant. Isn't there a website where you can post the worst-friggin-review you ever received? I think so. Anyone know where it is?
4. Beth and I visited Grandma and Miss R. yesterday. Party in the dining room, with a band that played polkas and Big Band music and the old standards you expect to hear in a nursing home. Grandma sang along, clapped her hand and wiggled her feet--and then got up and danced with her walker! I swear she hasn't danced in half a century (and this is the woman who could barely walk a year ago). Twice she paused in front of an elderly man, took his hands, and swung them in time to the music as if they were dancing in place. The old man beamed with pleasure, and all I could think was: so what alien from which planet kidnapped that infinitely crabby woman who drove me straight up a wall for years and years, and replaced her with Miss Congeniality, the queen of the ballroom?!?
5. Kanye West previously made an A-double-S out of himself by proudly displaying his lack of literary genius, among his numerous other antics that made the news. Now he's out-Kanyed himself with his horrendously disrespectful treatment of Taylor Swift at last night's MTV Music Awards.
Stun gun, anyone?
Sunday, September 13, 2009
THANKS FOR NOTHING
Yes, I'm talking to you: the person who tromped into Borders tonight after marinating for hours (maybe days) in some grotesque-smelling cologne that instantly triggered a migraine.
On the bright side, I've halfway through the rewrite of LMB. I guess four days in a row, 8 hrs a day, certainly pays off. At least till you start breathing solely through your nose, and retching, and rocking back and forth in pain.
On the bright side, I've halfway through the rewrite of LMB. I guess four days in a row, 8 hrs a day, certainly pays off. At least till you start breathing solely through your nose, and retching, and rocking back and forth in pain.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
PAUL GOLDSCHMIDT STRIKES AGAIN
The reviewer known as NOT ACTING MY AGE does it again. He trashed my first book. Now he's trashing Shawna. This is one of the "nicer" things he said:
"The fact that the book is inevitably hurtling towards a happy(-ish) conclusion is about the only thing that kept me going through this masochistic love fest."
Note to Mr. Goldschmidt:
I honestly don't care whether or not you like my books. The only reason I saw your review is because, like most self-centered authors, I use Google alerts. Trust me, my starred review from Booklist, and the fact that STW has been nominated as a YALSA BBYA, mean much more to me than your sadistic bash fest. Not only is your venomous post riddled with spelling errors like "reconciliattion" and "incessent", you also fail to get the details right, e.g. Shawna's mother dies from a stroke, not from cancer (in case you don't know this, people generally don't drop over dead from cancer).
However, carry on--and thanks for the laugh. Also, you're more than welcome for the publicity this post will bring to your very unprofessionally-written (and aptly titled) blog. xox
"The fact that the book is inevitably hurtling towards a happy(-ish) conclusion is about the only thing that kept me going through this masochistic love fest."
Note to Mr. Goldschmidt:
I honestly don't care whether or not you like my books. The only reason I saw your review is because, like most self-centered authors, I use Google alerts. Trust me, my starred review from Booklist, and the fact that STW has been nominated as a YALSA BBYA, mean much more to me than your sadistic bash fest. Not only is your venomous post riddled with spelling errors like "reconciliattion" and "incessent", you also fail to get the details right, e.g. Shawna's mother dies from a stroke, not from cancer (in case you don't know this, people generally don't drop over dead from cancer).
However, carry on--and thanks for the laugh. Also, you're more than welcome for the publicity this post will bring to your very unprofessionally-written (and aptly titled) blog. xox
Friday, September 11, 2009
STIFLING MY KILLER INSTINCT
I'm back in the Zone.
Trust me, it wasn't easy. Particularly when, after I unexpectedly get the day off, I rush to Borders at 4:00, buy my coffee, open my lap top, plug in my flash drive, flex my fingers, and--
Ditzy chick at the next table says (LOUDLY) into her cell phone: "Well, yanno, I guess I'm just not ready for a committment...but I mean, yanno, how long does it take for you to, yanno, knooowww?"
--Annoyed, but hey, at least she's speaking English. It might be interesting, future fodder or whatever--
"I mean, I haven't really mad a decision yet, but we're, like, soooo compatible--" (insert you know what and leave little to the imagination) "--omigod, I mean, yanno, blah, blah, blah..."
--Any initial sliver of amusement vanishes. Still, I don't own the place (yet). Plus her back is to me so it's not like I can GLARE or FEIGN ENOUGH MORBID INTEREST to compel her to lower her voice--
"Blah blah blaaaaaaaaah bad omigod, like, yanno blah blah blah..."
--OK. You can shut up now--
"Blahhhh blahblahblahhh..."
--I get up and walk around the store. "Eclipse" is in paperback, $12.99. Mmm, maybe some Jelly Bellies--
Back at the table: "Blah, blah, yanno, I mean, like totally blah, blah, and BLAH BLAH BLAH!"
--I stare at the screen, hating this girl. And hating, in general, people who talk on the cell phones in public places only because they tend to speak much louder than usual, the way folks in the olden days used to shout into those crank telephones. Personally, if I need to make a call at Borders, I take it outside--
"Omigod, I'm-blathering-about-crap-that-nobody-cares-about-and-it's-personal-as-all-hell-and-I'm sharing-it-with-the-whole-cafe-and-driving-people-nuts-and-I-don't-care-because-I'm-a-rude-self-centered-twit-who-rules-the-universe-and-all-these-totally-inane-details-about-my-crappy-lovelife-undoubtedly-fascinate-everyone-around-me-blahblah..."
--I stand up, pick up my lap top, and crash it down hard over her head.
Heh. Kidding.
After 30 minutes--THIRTY FREAKIN' MINUTES--Ditzy Chick snaps her cell shut and breezes out of the cafe.
Remember pea shooters?
Anyway, after that I got back into the groove and revised (re-WROTE) till 9 p.m.
Things are looking up. :)
REMEMBERING
Hearing the news.
Staring, transfixed, at the horrific images on TV.
That incredible sense of disbelief that sucked my heart out of my chest.
Crying.
Being really afraid.
Wanting to keep my family close to me for a long time after.
Fearing for my children's future.
Thinking how I'll never feel "normal" again.
Asking myself how?
Who?
Most of all--
Why?
PHOTO SOURCE
Monday, September 7, 2009
INSATIABLE
"Indestructible" dog toys don't exist.
I don't care who makes it. I don't what what they're "made" of. I don't care about the promises all over the labels. I don't care how many pitbulls they tried these toys out on, how many tanks rolled over it, how many alligator-infested swamps they experimeted with. I don't care if these toys survived the Chernobyl disaster.
I've tried them all, and Elijah eats them. He'd eat every shred if I didn't catch him in time and pry the soggy pieces out of his slavering jaws.
The only things he hasn't totally shredded yet are those rubber squeaky toys. And the reason he hasn't?
He won't play with them. He just gives me this "WTF" look. Then he prances over to chow down on my vaccuum cleaner hose.
I'm thinking of hauling in a hub cap. Or possibly a tire iron. Fetch!
I don't care who makes it. I don't what what they're "made" of. I don't care about the promises all over the labels. I don't care how many pitbulls they tried these toys out on, how many tanks rolled over it, how many alligator-infested swamps they experimeted with. I don't care if these toys survived the Chernobyl disaster.
I've tried them all, and Elijah eats them. He'd eat every shred if I didn't catch him in time and pry the soggy pieces out of his slavering jaws.
The only things he hasn't totally shredded yet are those rubber squeaky toys. And the reason he hasn't?
He won't play with them. He just gives me this "WTF" look. Then he prances over to chow down on my vaccuum cleaner hose.
I'm thinking of hauling in a hub cap. Or possibly a tire iron. Fetch!
Thursday, September 3, 2009
81 YEARS OF MARRIAGE!
Couple Parted by Death After 81 Years
I especially loved this, from a related link:
"When they celebrated their 81st wedding anniversary in May, the Milfords credited daily disagreements for keeping their marriage strong. 'Not big rows, just the odd cross word,' Anita Milford told The Times of London. 'As far as I am concerned, it’s healthy.'"
I especially loved this, from a related link:
"When they celebrated their 81st wedding anniversary in May, the Milfords credited daily disagreements for keeping their marriage strong. 'Not big rows, just the odd cross word,' Anita Milford told The Times of London. 'As far as I am concerned, it’s healthy.'"
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
AND THE WINNER IS...
ROBIN of TV AND BOOK ADDICT fame. Congratulations, Robin!
Congratulations also to Sherwood Smith who won a signed copy of STW in Melody Shore's contest.
And speeeeeeaaaking of Melody--check out her INTERVIEW with thepsycho psych nurse passing herself off as an author (namely me, of course). Melodye's interviews are always fun and this one is no exception! :)
Congratulations also to Sherwood Smith who won a signed copy of STW in Melody Shore's contest.
And speeeeeeaaaking of Melody--check out her INTERVIEW with the
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
TUESDAY BLATHER (because I'm too lazy to post a Teaser)
1. Tomorrow I'll post the winner of the STW/Amazon review contest. There's still time to get a review in. Also tomorrow, check out Melodye Shore's blog--she interviewed me! :)
2. Now that my paranormal is (essentially) finished and off to beta readers, I'm back to Linnea, who has been shelved all year. This is not a revision; like Rinn, it's a total rewrite. But now I face the dilemma of changing my MC's name.
Rinn.
Linn,
Rinn.
Linn.
Yep, one's gotta go.
3. What happened to My Life?
4. Merricat_84 enjoyed "Coraline." This book is also stuck somewhere in the middle of my TBR pile. Sigh. It's never-ending, isn't it?
5. Dog puke. There, I said it again: PUKE. PUKE. PUKE. W-t-h is with this mutt? Aside from the fact that he considers everything within reach of his jowls perfectly edible, and that includes grass clippings. Yeah, I know he looks like a cow, but does he have to eat like one? Or, more accurately, a billygoat. Taking him for a walk is yet one more experiment in terror: "NO! LEAVE IT!" (I wrestle with his jaws, froth and grass and god-knows-what spewing) "Spit it out, you freakin' moron!" (grr, grrrr!)
6. Sookie06 on LJ reminded me that this is usually the time I do a Grapemo. Oops.
7. Isn't grinding your teeth a sign of extreme neurosis?
(me in 5 years)
2. Now that my paranormal is (essentially) finished and off to beta readers, I'm back to Linnea, who has been shelved all year. This is not a revision; like Rinn, it's a total rewrite. But now I face the dilemma of changing my MC's name.
Rinn.
Linn,
Rinn.
Linn.
Yep, one's gotta go.
3. What happened to My Life?
4. Merricat_84 enjoyed "Coraline." This book is also stuck somewhere in the middle of my TBR pile. Sigh. It's never-ending, isn't it?
5. Dog puke. There, I said it again: PUKE. PUKE. PUKE. W-t-h is with this mutt? Aside from the fact that he considers everything within reach of his jowls perfectly edible, and that includes grass clippings. Yeah, I know he looks like a cow, but does he have to eat like one? Or, more accurately, a billygoat. Taking him for a walk is yet one more experiment in terror: "NO! LEAVE IT!" (I wrestle with his jaws, froth and grass and god-knows-what spewing) "Spit it out, you freakin' moron!" (grr, grrrr!)
6. Sookie06 on LJ reminded me that this is usually the time I do a Grapemo. Oops.
7. Isn't grinding your teeth a sign of extreme neurosis?
(me in 5 years)
Monday, August 31, 2009
FINAL DAY
Tomorrow is the final day to post an Amazon review for the Say the Word giveaway contest. Actually today was supposed to be the last day, but as I'm JUST NOW getting around to blogging this, you'll have till midnight tomorrow, Sept. 1st. I'll post the winning name on Wednesday. Thanks to all of you who've participated so far! *mwah*
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Thursday Thankful 5
1. Thank you, Melodye Shore, for the review & contest for Say the Word. *smooch*
2. Thank you all for the new Amazon/Goodreads/Blog reviews!!
3. Thank you to the beta readers so far who've agreed to read my paranormal.
4. Thank God for Beth, trapped for hours and hours and hours with the boisterous, sock-eating, face-slobbering, furniture-jumping, butter-licking, toe-chewing, hair-pulling, shoe-grabbing, TV-barking, constantly-attention-seeking monster known as Elijah so Mom can write in peace.
5. Thank you, Rinn, for letting me finish your story. But seriously, girl--99,000 words???
XOX to all!!!
2. Thank you all for the new Amazon/Goodreads/Blog reviews!!
3. Thank you to the beta readers so far who've agreed to read my paranormal.
4. Thank God for Beth, trapped for hours and hours and hours with the boisterous, sock-eating, face-slobbering, furniture-jumping, butter-licking, toe-chewing, hair-pulling, shoe-grabbing, TV-barking, constantly-attention-seeking monster known as Elijah so Mom can write in peace.
5. Thank you, Rinn, for letting me finish your story. But seriously, girl--99,000 words???
XOX to all!!!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
CONTEST REMINDER
In a effort to rack up a few more Amazon reviews for SAY THE WORD, I'm having a contest:
1. If you post a review on Amazon before September 1st you'll be entered in a drawing for a signed copy. Fear not: currently posted reviews of STW are automatically entered!
2. To increase your chances of winning, you can post your review on Goodreads, too.
3. Also, any new reviews of BEFORE, AFTER, AND SOMEBODY IN BETWEEN posted on Amazon between now and September 1st will further up your chances of winning a copy of STW.
4. When you post your review, simply e-mail me at jjgarsee at aol dot com and include the link(s).
PS Now that Amazon is letting me post reviews (yeah, we had "issues") I'm going to start posting some of my own, too. I have stack of 'em! :)
1. If you post a review on Amazon before September 1st you'll be entered in a drawing for a signed copy. Fear not: currently posted reviews of STW are automatically entered!
2. To increase your chances of winning, you can post your review on Goodreads, too.
3. Also, any new reviews of BEFORE, AFTER, AND SOMEBODY IN BETWEEN posted on Amazon between now and September 1st will further up your chances of winning a copy of STW.
4. When you post your review, simply e-mail me at jjgarsee at aol dot com and include the link(s).
PS Now that Amazon is letting me post reviews (yeah, we had "issues") I'm going to start posting some of my own, too. I have stack of 'em! :)
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
DAYS OF LITTLE TEXAS
The absolutely awesome Melodye Shore has a wonderful interview on her blog with R.A. Nelson, author of DAYS OF LITTLE TEXAS. Take a peek!
Another great Y.A. novel to add to my endlessly growing list of TBRs.
R.A. Nelson's WEBSITE
Another great Y.A. novel to add to my endlessly growing list of TBRs.
R.A. Nelson's WEBSITE
Friday, August 14, 2009
Blog Par-TAY
My very good friend Nadine's having a week-long BLOG PARTY--and I'm up today. If you like, stop by and say hi. :)
STILL AT IT
80 pages left to line edit and then back to the computer. I can't wait to see how many words I chopped out.
8,000 would be nice, rounding this monster down to an even 100k.
Somehow I doubt it.
8,000 would be nice, rounding this monster down to an even 100k.
Somehow I doubt it.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Random 5
1. Just survived my 5-day stretch at work. I beleive I'll rant about this in a later post.
2. Sarah Darer Littman mentioned me on her Magical Mystery Tour!
3. See Eli staked out in backyard. See nosy little Yorkie run in our yard, yap-yap-yapping, like: "Ha, ha, you're tied up and I'm not, la-la-la!" See Eli do his monster sized WOOF! WOOF! WOOF! and catapult after the shocked Yorkie, dragging the stake behind him, and chasing Yorkie straight back to his own house. Yorkie may be traumatized for life. Eli appears quite proud of himself. Not sure if the stake survived the ordeal.
4. I'm about 1/4 way through my hard copy revisions. I love Rinn's world. I want Rinn to make me rich. Light candles! :)
5. The problem with having a relative with Alzheimers is that she calls me twenty times a day because she doesn't remember the first 19 times she called. Yet she remembers the number. Go figure.
Off to Borders or I won't get anything done!
2. Sarah Darer Littman mentioned me on her Magical Mystery Tour!
3. See Eli staked out in backyard. See nosy little Yorkie run in our yard, yap-yap-yapping, like: "Ha, ha, you're tied up and I'm not, la-la-la!" See Eli do his monster sized WOOF! WOOF! WOOF! and catapult after the shocked Yorkie, dragging the stake behind him, and chasing Yorkie straight back to his own house. Yorkie may be traumatized for life. Eli appears quite proud of himself. Not sure if the stake survived the ordeal.
4. I'm about 1/4 way through my hard copy revisions. I love Rinn's world. I want Rinn to make me rich. Light candles! :)
5. The problem with having a relative with Alzheimers is that she calls me twenty times a day because she doesn't remember the first 19 times she called. Yet she remembers the number. Go figure.
Off to Borders or I won't get anything done!
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
PLEASE SPARE US!
Sadistic aliens have conquered Earth.
Those of you who refuse to cooperate will be bound and gagged with your eyelids clamped open (think A Clockwork Orange) and planted in front of Headline News.
You will then be forced to watch only ONE CONTINUOUS NEWS STORY.
Luckily you have 2 choices:
Those of you who refuse to cooperate will be bound and gagged with your eyelids clamped open (think A Clockwork Orange) and planted in front of Headline News.
You will then be forced to watch only ONE CONTINUOUS NEWS STORY.
Luckily you have 2 choices:
Monday, August 10, 2009
HORRORSCOPE
Your social life (??????) could suffer today because you aren't eager to spend your valuable time engaged in lighthearted banter (gossip and conspiracy issues) or playful games (umm...) that distract you from your real purpose (which is finishing this novel). It's not that you don't know how to have a good time; it's just that you would rather enjoy yourself when the pressure of unfulfilled obligations wasn't (<--is that the right tense?) weighing on your shoulders. There's no need for long explanations; just let others know that you'll be ready for fun soon enough.
"I'll be ready for fun soon enough." By 2010 for SURE.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Saturday, August 8, 2009
CRANKY
Okay, the BEST way to edit is to read the manuscript out loud. Seriously, you (well, me anyway) find so many errors that you miss when you read it on the computer. Of course it helps to have someone to read it TO--otherwise you just sit there reading out loud to yourself and get really weird looks from people who do much weirder things than read out loud to themselves.
Like talk on blue tooths behind you in line at Starbucks, so when you turn around and go "Pardon me?" and they keep on blabbing, you decide they're schizophrenic and quite clearly off their meds, so you quickly step a safe distance away.
Then you notice the blue tooth and wanna punch 'em in the nose.
Yeah, I'm cranky. I've been cranky since a trip to the grocery store (Big Bird) yesterday. Ticked off from moment I parked my car. NOT in the "expectant mothers" space, either. Because it was taken.
1. Before I even get through the doors there's somebody standing there blocking my way. WHY are you standing in the freaking doorway? Did you forget if you're coming in or going out? You don't have a cart. GET OUT OF MY WAY!
2. Two-for-the-price-of-one dog toys--and there was only one left. Ask me if I bought it. Elijah would love it. It didn't occur to me till later that they'd probably charge me half price. But seeing that TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE sign with only ONE TOY LEFT ticked me off. So I bought a different toy instead.
Which Eli ignores.
3. I love when I grab a food item out of a case, turn around to put it in my cart, and--you guessed it--someone ELSE is blocking my way. Standing right between me and my cart. Why are YOU in my way? I should wear a T-shirt: "PLEASE NO NOT SNEAK UP ON THE PSYCH NURSE." Does the term "boundaries" mean anything to these people?
4. The whole wheat bread I like (I lost 13 pounds since switching to whole grain and shedding my Mrs. Butterton habit of using one stick per bagel) was over $3 a loaf. I....don't....THINK....so!!!
5. The self-serve check-out lines were full (that figures) so I moved to an EMPTY full-serve one. The cashier dude looks 14.
"Did you find everything?"
What if I said "Oh, no, wait! I need a box of Depends--can you grab one for me?" would he leave his post? Fact: I am standing in line. Obviously I found everything or I'd still be wandering the aisles listening to Barry Manilow.
He rings up one item--then says "I'll be right back" and rushes off. In the middle of ringing me up!
Stand, wait, tap my foot. Dude returns after a couple minutes which is a damn long time when you're standing in line.
"Sorry."
Uh-huh. So he rings up most of my stuff, and pauses at the dog toy. He picks it up. He holds it up to the light. He shakes it. He studies it. He does everything but lick it.
"What's this?"
"Uh, it's a dog toy?" I mean, jeex, there's even a picture of a doggy on the label, in case you can't tell by looking at it.
"What's it do?"
"It's a toy."
"Yeah, but what's it do?"
"I may never know."
Whoosh! Right over his head. He shakes it again and throws it in a bag. THEN he commits the mortal sin of asking me if I want my milk in a bag. I liked it better when they'd say "Paper or Plastic?" because then I could stand there and look at the plastic bags, then the paper bags, then the plastic bags again, and ask "Mmm, I don't know...which is better?" just to see what they'd say. Now it's all plastic. Helloooooo, mighty landfills.
T-shirt #2: YES I WANT MY FREAKING MILK IN A BAG!
(I admit I kind of obsess over this "milk-in-a-bag" thing)
He finishes ringing me up, takes 15 seconds to count out the right change, and says, "Come again!" Yeah, hopefully on his day off.
So I was cranky yesterday, and cranky today, and I'll probably be crankycrankycranky till my next day off so I can get back to work on my second revision. I think that's Tuesday.
Or maybe Wednesday.
Like talk on blue tooths behind you in line at Starbucks, so when you turn around and go "Pardon me?" and they keep on blabbing, you decide they're schizophrenic and quite clearly off their meds, so you quickly step a safe distance away.
Then you notice the blue tooth and wanna punch 'em in the nose.
Yeah, I'm cranky. I've been cranky since a trip to the grocery store (Big Bird) yesterday. Ticked off from moment I parked my car. NOT in the "expectant mothers" space, either. Because it was taken.
1. Before I even get through the doors there's somebody standing there blocking my way. WHY are you standing in the freaking doorway? Did you forget if you're coming in or going out? You don't have a cart. GET OUT OF MY WAY!
2. Two-for-the-price-of-one dog toys--and there was only one left. Ask me if I bought it. Elijah would love it. It didn't occur to me till later that they'd probably charge me half price. But seeing that TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE sign with only ONE TOY LEFT ticked me off. So I bought a different toy instead.
Which Eli ignores.
3. I love when I grab a food item out of a case, turn around to put it in my cart, and--you guessed it--someone ELSE is blocking my way. Standing right between me and my cart. Why are YOU in my way? I should wear a T-shirt: "PLEASE NO NOT SNEAK UP ON THE PSYCH NURSE." Does the term "boundaries" mean anything to these people?
4. The whole wheat bread I like (I lost 13 pounds since switching to whole grain and shedding my Mrs. Butterton habit of using one stick per bagel) was over $3 a loaf. I....don't....THINK....so!!!
5. The self-serve check-out lines were full (that figures) so I moved to an EMPTY full-serve one. The cashier dude looks 14.
"Did you find everything?"
What if I said "Oh, no, wait! I need a box of Depends--can you grab one for me?" would he leave his post? Fact: I am standing in line. Obviously I found everything or I'd still be wandering the aisles listening to Barry Manilow.
He rings up one item--then says "I'll be right back" and rushes off. In the middle of ringing me up!
Stand, wait, tap my foot. Dude returns after a couple minutes which is a damn long time when you're standing in line.
"Sorry."
Uh-huh. So he rings up most of my stuff, and pauses at the dog toy. He picks it up. He holds it up to the light. He shakes it. He studies it. He does everything but lick it.
"What's this?"
"Uh, it's a dog toy?" I mean, jeex, there's even a picture of a doggy on the label, in case you can't tell by looking at it.
"What's it do?"
"It's a toy."
"Yeah, but what's it do?"
"I may never know."
Whoosh! Right over his head. He shakes it again and throws it in a bag. THEN he commits the mortal sin of asking me if I want my milk in a bag. I liked it better when they'd say "Paper or Plastic?" because then I could stand there and look at the plastic bags, then the paper bags, then the plastic bags again, and ask "Mmm, I don't know...which is better?" just to see what they'd say. Now it's all plastic. Helloooooo, mighty landfills.
T-shirt #2: YES I WANT MY FREAKING MILK IN A BAG!
(I admit I kind of obsess over this "milk-in-a-bag" thing)
He finishes ringing me up, takes 15 seconds to count out the right change, and says, "Come again!" Yeah, hopefully on his day off.
So I was cranky yesterday, and cranky today, and I'll probably be crankycrankycranky till my next day off so I can get back to work on my second revision. I think that's Tuesday.
Or maybe Wednesday.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
MONSTER WORD COUNT
108,000 words. That's one hundred and eight thousand words.
Did you guess that I finished the first round of revisions today? Tomorrow I'll print it out, proof-read (haha) and edit by hand, then make the changes and send it off to my betas.
Who will die when they see it. Seriously: one hundred and eight thousand words?????
OK, on the plus side: that's still > 10,000 fewer words than Twilight.
On the minus side: that's almost as freakin' LONG as Twilight!
Somehow I need to knock off another 8,000.
My agent says a book is as long as it needs to be. She'll change her tune when her printer explodes.
I need Twizzlers bad. Or Tums. Or Twizzler-flavored Tums.
Excuse me. I have to go take out a loan to print this out at CopyMax. After my Valium.
Did you guess that I finished the first round of revisions today? Tomorrow I'll print it out, proof-read (haha) and edit by hand, then make the changes and send it off to my betas.
Who will die when they see it. Seriously: one hundred and eight thousand words?????
OK, on the plus side: that's still > 10,000 fewer words than Twilight.
On the minus side: that's almost as freakin' LONG as Twilight!
Somehow I need to knock off another 8,000.
My agent says a book is as long as it needs to be. She'll change her tune when her printer explodes.
I need Twizzlers bad. Or Tums. Or Twizzler-flavored Tums.
Excuse me. I have to go take out a loan to print this out at CopyMax. After my Valium.
THURSDAY 5
Yeah, I know it's not Friday. I just said that in the title.
1. I believe it's perfectly okay to blow off revisions to spend a couple of hours blabbing with a friend. :)
*waving to Susan Taylor Brown*
2. Fellow LJer Sarah Darer Littman was sweet enough to take time out from her vacation to have breakfast with me and sign her book:
Thanks again, Sarah!
3. Our power went out yesterday evening. Instant panic: HOW CAN I WORK ON MY REVISIONS? I have a P.O.S. battery on my laptop that lasts, like, a nanosecond. I couldn't watch TV. I couldn't even cook dinner (wait, wait, that's on the PLUS side) so I ran out to Chipotle's for a barbacoa burrito which not only is not on my diet, but it ripped my stomach to shreds. I ended up reading while daylight held out, then fell asleep with my iPod in my ears. At 8:00 p.m, I might add, which is why I've been up since 4:25 a.m.
4. No more day care for Elijah this week b/c there's a massive virus going around. I swear this is exactly like day care for your kids (only cheaper). Any time you get a bunch of warm bodies together in one place, sooner or later there's an epidemic of something involving rampant body fluids.
5. I've been off work this week and diligently working on revisions. I have about 20 pages left, the hardest 20 pages of the entire ms. Then I'll print it off to re-revise by hand and proofread at the same time. Right now it's a heart-stopping 108k--an improvement from the original count count, but still huge.
HUUUUGE!
HUUUGE!
HUUUUGE!
1. I believe it's perfectly okay to blow off revisions to spend a couple of hours blabbing with a friend. :)
*waving to Susan Taylor Brown*
2. Fellow LJer Sarah Darer Littman was sweet enough to take time out from her vacation to have breakfast with me and sign her book:
Thanks again, Sarah!
3. Our power went out yesterday evening. Instant panic: HOW CAN I WORK ON MY REVISIONS? I have a P.O.S. battery on my laptop that lasts, like, a nanosecond. I couldn't watch TV. I couldn't even cook dinner (wait, wait, that's on the PLUS side) so I ran out to Chipotle's for a barbacoa burrito which not only is not on my diet, but it ripped my stomach to shreds. I ended up reading while daylight held out, then fell asleep with my iPod in my ears. At 8:00 p.m, I might add, which is why I've been up since 4:25 a.m.
4. No more day care for Elijah this week b/c there's a massive virus going around. I swear this is exactly like day care for your kids (only cheaper). Any time you get a bunch of warm bodies together in one place, sooner or later there's an epidemic of something involving rampant body fluids.
5. I've been off work this week and diligently working on revisions. I have about 20 pages left, the hardest 20 pages of the entire ms. Then I'll print it off to re-revise by hand and proofread at the same time. Right now it's a heart-stopping 108k--an improvement from the original count count, but still huge.
HUUUUGE!
HUUUGE!
HUUUUGE!
DOGHOUSE ROCK
I Twittered that my house looks like Alcatraz. This is why:
I have three of these--one leading upstairs, one leading downstairs, and one on kitchen door #1. Kitchen door #2 has a smaller wooden gate that Elijah can jump over, so I added a bunch of junk to block it off. That makes FOUR GATES with bars in a 500 square foot area which I believe makes my house the first split-level cell block evvahh.
OK, I'm advertising this place because I love it: dog and cat owners, check out PET EDGE. You can't beat the prices, (though the shipping rates on these gates just about killed me; however, they're worth--every--penny).
Now if I can only get him to take a dump in the yard. Yeah, Elijah seems to be laboring under the delusion that the backyard is an "extension" of his house, so naturally he doesn't want to do the dirty deed there. I'll haul him around the yard, begging "Please poop! Please poop!" while he sniffs and eats grass and barks at the doxie two yards away. Eventually he'll drag me all the way to the end of the street where he'll dump on a neighbor's lawn--inevitably at the house of the two NOISY beagles he loves to harass--"Ha-ha, I crapped on your territory, you pyscho morons!"--and then I can schelp it back home in a plastic bag. A backpack is next on my wish list: "Here, mutt. Carry it home yourself."
:)
I have three of these--one leading upstairs, one leading downstairs, and one on kitchen door #1. Kitchen door #2 has a smaller wooden gate that Elijah can jump over, so I added a bunch of junk to block it off. That makes FOUR GATES with bars in a 500 square foot area which I believe makes my house the first split-level cell block evvahh.
OK, I'm advertising this place because I love it: dog and cat owners, check out PET EDGE. You can't beat the prices, (though the shipping rates on these gates just about killed me; however, they're worth--every--penny).
Now if I can only get him to take a dump in the yard. Yeah, Elijah seems to be laboring under the delusion that the backyard is an "extension" of his house, so naturally he doesn't want to do the dirty deed there. I'll haul him around the yard, begging "Please poop! Please poop!" while he sniffs and eats grass and barks at the doxie two yards away. Eventually he'll drag me all the way to the end of the street where he'll dump on a neighbor's lawn--inevitably at the house of the two NOISY beagles he loves to harass--"Ha-ha, I crapped on your territory, you pyscho morons!"--and then I can schelp it back home in a plastic bag. A backpack is next on my wish list: "Here, mutt. Carry it home yourself."
:)
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