Sunday, March 27, 2011

Ban Musical Chairs!

I think Musical Chairs is way, waaay too stressful a game for children for play. I watched them play it at my niece's birthday party and I practically had a nervous breakdown.

Think about it. Remember when you played it? Did you actually like it?

I bet not.

You're afraid to pass any chair while the music is playing. You guard it till the last second, when the kid behind gets too close for comfort. You hope against hope that the music won't stop before you've reached the next chair. Suddenly, all of your "friends" have become your enemies, willing to do anything to knock you out of the game. Talk about paranoia.

The music screeches to a halt. A kid leaps into YOUR chair, shoving you out of the way, and everyone else finds a chair as well.

And there you are, standing all by yourself.

Alone.

Chairless.

In silence, except for a few smug ha-ha-ha's.

And you stumble away in humiliation and defeat while the music resumes, and those who are left continue the wretched game.

OK: Duck-Duck-Goose is fun. Pin-the-Tail-on-the-Donkey is fun. Tag is fun. Hide-and-Seek is fun (unless nobody bothers to look for you). Heck, even Dodgeball is fun...so much fun, in fact, that some schools have actually outlawed it. Dodgeball gives you an opportunity to bash someone else with the ball. And you are moving, too, not slinking around a circle of chairs...those chairs...omg, those coveted chaaaairs! In Dodgeball nobody follows you, invading your personal space, hurrying you along, breathing down your neck. There's no jolly music to be choked off right in the middle of the tune--which, in itself, I find extremely disturbing. One second you hear it. The next second you don't. Maybe you were humming along. I don't even like it when my husband switches the TV in the middle of a commercial. I prefer closure, I guess. Or else I was taught that it's rude to interrupt.

I used to break out in a cold sweat whenever I had to play Musical Chairs. Now, as an adult, I still find it painful to watch. I don't think my nephew liked it much, either. He got bounced out twice and looked positively heartbroken. I gave him bubblegum. What I really wanted to do was whisper in his ear: Tante hates this game, too. Hey, I know! Let's go find some cap guns and scare the shit out of 'em ALL!

Something tells me I may be a bad influence on this child.

So...who besides me also HATED that game? :)

1 comment:

Mry Jhnsn said...

hahahaha... still cracks me up!