Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Editing, Editing

Edit, edit. Cut, cut. Write, write. Delete, delete. Check word count every thirty-five seconds, not that I'm obsessed or anything.

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"Please, please, please! I desperately need a break from this madness!"

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"A break, you say? But you're under contract. You get no break!"

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"That's right, you lazy, no-talent slob! Listen to hairy little pal. You must edit! You must edit!"

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"I can't, I can't! I'm exhausted. I must sleep, sleep, sleeeeep....."

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"Oh, no! Now what?"

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"I'll tell you now what! NO MONEY. She'll live the rest of her life in squalor, blogging idiotic anecdotes about nothing. Ahh-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-hahaha!"

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"Wait. She gets money for this?"

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("...I get money?")

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"Only if you write something worth reading! Before your damn deadline! Time's running out, my pretty!"

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"But...but...I'm doing the best I can! Oh, have a heart!"

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"I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that."

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"Oh, don't let that old beyotch intimidate you, honey. You know you can do it. You can do it! Do it! DO IT! DO IT!"

BAM!

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Silence.


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"Um, I meant finish your edits, you silly girl!"

2 comments:

LisaYak said...

ah, your creativity knows no bounds, my dear! LOVED this post.

And, if it helps, I'm right there with you in editing hell (um, and I was JUST about to get back to it, in fact, when I stumbled on this blog post...yeah, that's it...not like I was surfing endlessly in avoidance or anything...)

Jeannine said...

Yeah, I hear ya!

Edit...goof around...edit...goof around...nothing wrong with OUR attention span, is there? :)